RNY Mama

On June 2, 2010, in Uncategorized, by Andrea

Baby Viking

One of my biggest challenges in life is the balance of my WLS-life and my mama-life.

I was fat my entire life.

Now, if you ask my mother?  She would tell you that I was “chunky” through school and that I only got fat when I left high school and got married.  I disagree.  When a high schooler must wear Women’s department clothing rather than the trendy stuff in the Junior’s department?  That’s fat.  Different degrees of fat, perhaps.  But fat.  Just so we’re on the same page, tis all.

And now, I have kids.

Now, they aren’t fat at all.  Or chunky.  And I’m not just saying that as a mom with rose-colored glasses who looks past the fat rolls on their baby and says “oh, that’s what all babies look like!”

My 4 year old’s BMI at her last doctor’s appointment with Duke on 5/5?  14.5 (25th percentile, so a bit underweight).

The 2 year old’s at the same appointment?  16.6 (50th percentile, so absolutely normal).

But they EAT.  My God do they EAT?!

Breakfast is a package of plain oatmeal (which, guys, is a lot if you consider the size of their stomachs?  It should be smaller than my 6 year old pouch..) with some preserves and some fruit on top.  And less than 30 minutes later?  “Hungry!  HUNGRY!!”

Then fruit.  More fruit.  2 full bananas isn’t enough to satiate the baby viking.  The two of them can demolish a pound of strawberries in 10 minutes flat.  And I only wish I were exaggerating here.

Lunch is typically 6 chicken nuggets, a cheese stick, and a side of fruit.  Which would stuff me to agony.

Not 30 minutes later?  “Mama, I’m hungry.  Feed me!”

The mind, it boggles with how much food these two can put away.

And I’m not even talking simple carbs like mac and cheese, or even bread.  These are good, solid proteins!

Eventually I’ll drag out yogurt, and raisins, even more fruit?  Just to quell the “Hungry! Hungry! Hungry!” cries that dominate through the house as I sit and stare in wonder.  And long for their metabolism as I have to RUN in order to burn calories.  It’s not fair.

It’s really hard not to push my own food issues onto the kids.  And to a degree, somewhat, I have I know.  We’ve never had sugary drinks for the kids.  Kool-aid (for their ONE “juice” a day) is sweetened with Splenda (Girl-child has inherited my migraines and the aspartame trigger.. lucky her!  I hate my genes..) and juice is a rare treat and generally when we are out and about and can’t be helped.  Chocolate milk is a downright celebration (especially since both kids have soy and milk allergies) and is guzzled right on down with cheers and smiles that are miles wide (and inevitable sugar rushes).  The kids drink WATER at home through the day.  The very few times Girl-child has had soda?  She’s not liked it.

Swede and Mini-Swede

With all of that said, their Papa has a wonderful metabolism that allows him to come home and fix a huge pot of pasta with parmesan cheese and butter almost every night, avoid veggies and fruits like a plague, and drink Mountain Dew and regular Red Bulls without a problem.  The kids, of course, LOVE pasta being miniature carbwhores themselves.  And I?  Go for a run instead.  Because being in the same room with pasta is enough to make me gain water weight, much less think about eating some of it.  I’m not tempted to eat any of it — that’s not it at all.  At 6 years out, I’ve gotten past the “poor me, I’m deprived” mindset.  If I want some, I’ll have some, or have him fix Dreamfields instead.  I just don’t.

In looking at my kids, my daughter is my husband’s clone.  Down to her toes that can pinch you (yes, eww, disgusting!).  I imagine she’ll inherit his disgusgingly wonderful metabolism.  I hate him for it.  Sorta.  In the “I love you for everything but the way you metabolize food” sorta way.  But my son?  Oh boy, he’s my clone.  We might as well start saving for his WLS now.  Perhaps a VSG for his 13th birthday?  Just in case?  Cause if he continues to be just like me?  He’s gonna need it.

People have asked me to do blog posts on how to integrate having RNY with family life.  Folks?  You’re barking up the wrong rosebush.  With tons of thorns.  Because this is something I struggle with everyday.  How much food is too much?  Am I starving them when I say “no” to more food 30 minutes after their breakfast?  Should I be feeding them more?  Are they too skinny?  Are they getting enough exercise (and no, they aren’t)?  How do I get their Papa to eat a more rounded meal?  How do I incorporate their food intolerances into those meal plans?  How do I not go insane while doing all of this? (Xanax, maybe?)

And while I usually have some great insight in my posts — this isn’t one of them.  It’s simply a reflection of my everyday life as I’ve been asked, once again, for another banana.   And the insecurities that lie within the everyday condition of being a Mom. We always want better for our kids than we had for ourselves.. but how exactly do we do that?

But if you’ll excuse me?  It’s been 2 1/2 hours since breakfast and they’re “starving”.  It’s time to start lunch.

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8 Responses to “RNY Mama”

  1. rny_alison says:

    Have you tried giving them a different type of breakfast?

    If I eat carbs like fruit (and yes, I can eat a pound of fresh fruit) or even whole grains like oatmeal, I am hungry an hour later. A banana does nothing for me. Heck, I can eat 2 large bananas and not get anything out of it.

    My husband stays full on oatmeal for hours. I make oatmeal for his breakfast.

    For me, it’s eggs that keep me from eating an hour later.

    It’s funny how our bodies work like that.

  2. Andrea says:

    Yup. We’ve tried a number of breakfasts. We’ve tried yogurt for breakfast, soy-free bread that I special order from California with peanut butter and some yogurt or fruit, whole-wheat pancakes, etc. Just no-go.

    It doesn’t matter WHAT they eat. They are consistently hungry. We went to Cheesecake Factory on Saturday. She ate a TON of food. 20 minutes later “I’m hungry!” and I have to wonder how much is just mental.

  3. rny_alison says:

    Have you tried a solid protein/no-carb breakfast?

    I’m guessing yes, but your examples didn’t mention one so I thought I’d check.

  4. Andrea says:

    The special bread? Is actually carb-free.

  5. rny_alison says:

    Ooh, carb free bread? Can you send me a link so I can purchase some?

    I do low carb wraps, pitas, etc. But they still have 4 net carbs per serving.

    Carb-free bread just blows my mind.

  6. Andrea says:

    Well. 2g. But still. Do search for Julian Bakery.

  7. Andrea says:

    (On here. I did two reviews.)

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